The Weather Report

Many years ago, a group of Oxford schoolmasters who called themselves The Master Singers got together and issued a couple of novelty 45s, produced by George Martin (you may have heard of him—he also produced records for this group called the Beatles).  The Master Singers took sections of the British Highway Code, the BBC weather report, and a couple of other similar chunks of bureaucratic tedium, and set them to Sarum plainsong.  The Master Singers Perform the Highway Code went nearly to the top of the UK pop charts for several weeks in the spring of 1966.  In honor of this feat, I present my local weather forecast for Tuesday and Wednesday.

1. A vigorous upper-level storm system, accompanied by a strong surface cold front, * will move into and through the Hill Country and south central Texas tonight and Wednesday.
2. This combination of winter weather systems * will usher in the coldest weather of the season.
3. Blustery north winds gusting to over 30 MPH will accompany the much colder temperatures, * creating wind chills in the single digits.
4. The potential for showers and thunderstorms today will change over to a mix of rain, freezing rain, sleet or snow in the Hill Country tonight and Wednesday, * and in central Texas Wednesday.
5. Snow and ice accumulations will be less than an inch in most areas * due to the relatively warm ground.
6. Some hazards to travel could develop by Wednesday, especially on exposed overpasses and bridges, * in the Hill country and central Texas northward into north Texas.

7. Persons in the Hill Country and central Texas are urged to take advantage of the favorable weather today * and prepare for the adverse winter weather tonight and Wednesday.
8. Freezing temperatures are forecast for the Hill Country by daybreak Wednesday morning * and well-below freezing, in the 20s, Wednesday night and Thursday morning.
9. Those planning travel tonight and Wednesday across the watch area and northward * should listen for the latest weather developments throughout the day.
10. Protection to outdoor pets, livestock and poultry, as well as exposed water pipes, car radiators, plants and vegetation, * should be initiated today.
11. Depending on weather conditions, * the watch area may need to be reconfigured in areal coverage.

12. Tonight, it will be windy and cold with a 70 percent chance of rain or showers, * possibly mixed with freezing rain or sleet toward early morning.
13. Lows are expected in the lower 30s * and north winds from 15 to 25 MPH.
14. Accumulations will be less than half an inch toward early morning; * caution is advised on area lakes.

15. Wednesday will bring a 90 percent chance of rain, * becoming mixed with sleet, freezing rain, or possibly snow.
16. Temperatures are predicted for the mid 30s, with north winds 15 to 20 MPH, * and accumulations of less than an inch.

Louis XIV sang a jazz scat solo to some herring.  Fnord.